Stassi, You're My New BFF In My Head!

 
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Dear Stassi,

You may (or more likely) may not follow my blog.  Who am I kidding, you don't, because I barely have an audience of 5.   Actually, it's 2.  Just my husband and me.  Oh, well - anyway, back to the point.  I have lots of best friends in my head.  Guess what!?!  You are defiantly one of them!  As someone who values the fine art of weaving elegant sarcasm in with uniquely hilarious observations, I knew you were the one.  Anyone who understands the annoyances one feels towards models complaining on Twitter about "just another day at the office" (while at a resort - eyeroll), and at the same time promoting the everyday joys you will come to find on Tradsey, is and always will be my Best Friend In My Head.

How does one become a BFF In My Head, YOU Ask?

The way I bestow this unique honor  upon an unsuspecting individual is through a both meticulous and detailed oriented process.  Are you ready for it?  Get your notepad out ... I watch your TV show and/or listen to your Podcast.  M-I-N-D blown.  I'm pretty much an obsessive-compulsive for anything on Bravo.  And Vanderpump Rules is my favorite!  I rank it above ALL of the Real Housewives.  I think it is because I can relate to the plight of the SURvers.  Oh, and they say A LOT of funny s**t. 

Memories...

I too was a waitress.  I waited tables throughout most of my college career and can remember with gleeful joy being literally stepped over by a fellow server upon a particularly nasty fall while carrying a drink tray.  Let us also not forget the ubiquitous sound of plates of food crashing, relationships ending, and the sound of friendships enduring.  I'm pretty sure this is the formula for every single restaurant on the planet.  Some things just are.  No matter the culture or time period, anyone who has ever worked in a restaurant knows exactly what I'm talking about.  You develop a kindred spirit with all others who have endured this sometimes hell-on-earth and other times pure excitement.  So, I get it.  Minus, the added interest of all this being documented on television.  Kindred spirits. Former waitresses. 

Oh, and you have a podcast!  One of the quickest ways to become my imaginary best friend is to have a podcast, or just a sense of humor.

Podcasts in general have become a best friend of mine in their own right.  Practically every topic you can think of is represented.  I love to listen while driving. The anger and fury I usually develop while sitting in gridlock traffic is greatly mitigated.  I'm sure lives have been saved.  Your podcast, Straight Up With Stassi, is one of my favorites. The more sarcastic someone is with humor, the more I like and respect them.  On any given second of any given day, you will no doubt hear a million things to be depressed about.  Why not take an hour out and laugh at yourself or someone else instead?  Listening to someone you can relate to (even in the smallest amount) talk about random silly s**t, makes the world a happier place.

So there you have it.  You are the Khaleesi to my baby dragon, the fried pickles to my ranch dressing.  Stassi Schroeder, you are my Best Friend In My Head. You're life is now complete. You're welcome.

LYLAS!

Eve Slaughter